FSS Spotlight:  Dr. Phil's Authenticity Litmus Test    

We all have beliefs and attitudes that shape our views. Now it's time to equip yourself with some clear-cut criteria for authenticity, the standard by which you can test your internal responses. Through this self-appraisal, you will determine whether your perceptions, thoughts and attitudes contribute to your authentic self or pull you instead toward a fictional self-concept.

When you use these questions to evaluate your every thought and perception, you will see clearly how authentic or fictional your internal thoughts are. Respond to these questions, write them out, and save them for future Self Matters exercises.

1. Enter a thought, belief or attitude that you hold about yourself.

2. Is it a true fact? Is what you are thinking or feeling verifiably true?

3. Does holding on to the thought or attitude serve your best interests? Does it make you happy, calm, peaceful and fulfilled?

4. Are your thoughts and attitudes advancing and protecting your health? Do your thoughts about yourself push you into situations that put your well-being at risk?

5. Does this attitude or belief get you more of what you want, need and deserve? Or is it leading you toward or keeping you in circumstances that you don't want?

In order to define your self-concept and how it came to be, you need to understand two major sets of factors that help shape who you are:

External Factors: You can trace who you've become in this life back to 10 defining moments, seven critical choices and five pivotal people. You cannot change these moments, choices and people, but once acknowledged, you can begin to work on changing your future.

Internal Factors: Unlike the external factors that we have no control over, our internal factors are made up of our own reactions to the events in our life. Since these reactions happen within us, we have the power to change them. Identifying these factors along with the effects that they have had on your self-concept will allow you to deal with them in the here and now. By doing this you will be able to take your power back, stop being a passenger in your life, and start driving.

According to Dr. Phil, you can trace who you've become in this life to three types of external factors: 10 defining moments, seven critical choices, and five pivotal people. But first it's important to understand the following terms:

Ten Defining Moments: In every person's life, there have been moments, both positive and negative, that have defined and redefined who you are. Those events entered your consciousness with such power that they changed the very core of who and what you thought you were. A part of you was changed by those events, and caused you to define
yourself, to some  degree by your experience of that event.

Seven Critical Choices: There are a surprisingly small number of choices that rise to the level of life-changing ones. Critical choices are those that have changed your life, positively or negatively, and are major factors in determining who and what you will become. They are the choices that have affected your life up to today, and have set you on a path.

Five Pivotal People: These are the people who have left indelible impressions on your concept of self, and therefore, the life you live. They may be family members, friends or
co-workers, and their influences can be either positive or negative. They are people who can determine whether you live consistently with your authentic self, or instead live a counterfeit life controlled by a fictional self that has crowded out who you really are.

Internal factors are reactions that you create inside yourself in response to the world. Even though they happen inside you, it's best to think about them as behaviors because they are actions that you choose. By choosing how to perceive yourself, you can either behave your way to success or behave your way to failure. For example, if you believe you are competent and special, you will live up to that truth. If you believe you are incompetent and worthless, you will live down to that truth.

The powerful internal factors that shape your self-concept are:

Internal Dialogue: This is the continuous conversation that you have with yourself about everything that happens to you. This dialogue is constant, happens in real time (at the
same rate at which you would speak the words aloud), and provokes a physiological change (with each thought comes a physical reaction).

Labeling: Humans tend to organize things into categories. We even categorize other humans by labeling them into groups, subgroups, classes and functions. But were you aware that we label ourselves? For better or worse, these labels have a powerful impact on our perception of self because we tend to "live" the categories we've attached to ourselves ("I'm a loser" or "I'm a winner.")

Tapes: These are beliefs that have become so deeply ingrained that they "play" automatically in our heads and influence our behavior without our awareness. Unlike labels ("I never win"), tapes have context: "I won't get the promotion because I never win." Tapes are dangerous and potentially self-defeating because they have the power to set you up for a specific outcome.

Fixed Beliefs / Limiting Beliefs: Fixed beliefs are the beliefs we hold about ourselves, others, and life's circumstances that have been repeated for so long they have become
ingrained and are difficult to change. Limiting beliefs are the beliefs we have about ourselves that limit what we reach for and achieve. They also cause us to block any conflicting (positive) information while confirming any new negative information.